In the know…

I was cleaning the car this morning and had the radio on to a news station from San Francisco. When Karla and I go driving and the conversation runs dry, I suggest that we turn on the radio and listen to “traffic and weather together every ten minutes” from the Bay Area. This morning I heard that there were scattered traffic cones in the number one lane and a large box in the right lane of some freeway. Wow. How cool. I felt really in the know, and could carry on a relevant conversation with a Bay Area native.

But then I thought why not make those traffic reports more interesting to people other than the drivers who are approaching all those hazards. Like, instead of a large box, make it a large box of barge locks. The traffic cones could be traffic cones like doggie bones.

Once we heard a report on the radio of a car that was crushed by a truck, the driver trapped and burned beyond recognition. I said to Karla that there was one good thing about that otherwise terrible outcome. “What’s that?” she asked. “He should at least get a discount from the crematorium.”

She made me turn the radio off.